The Knighting

A (with a pool noodle): I dub thee Sir David. 

M (hits A with noodle): I dub...

A: No, the king doesn't hit the knight. Or he'd chop off his arm or head. It's a sharp sword. So, he taps lightly. (Demonstrates.) I dub thee Sir David.

M (gently): I dub thee Sir Mommy!!